Romance Novels

Every so often I get into a funk. I stop reading and wonder if I am truly a reader at all?

 

And so I do what we all do, dive into the free section of Kindle and iBooks and download romance novels.

 

Book 1: Enjoyable with some relative steamy sex scenes. Lights a fire and I decide I should keep going.

 

Book 2-3: Well, one of them was a flop and the other one was a fish on deck just flopping its way back.

 

By book 4 I really feel like maybe this was the wrong path and by book 6 I am pissed.

 

Because this is how MOST, not all, modern romances go.

 

Woman is a tough to boot firecracker personality who cannot be tamed.

Man is a douche.

 

Douche does something stupid. Firecracker responds with fire. Douche responds by forcing a kiss, firecrackers yields and shows her vulnerabilities. Douche keeps pressing but is a douche. Firecracker fires back up.

 

Hot sex.

 

Crying.

 

Firecracker leaves in tears over a stupid misunderstanding.

 

Douche is allowed to explain his side, firecracker parts her legs.

 

They get married and move into a nice house.

 

Seriously. That’s it. That is the blueprint to a modern romance. I swear I am going to write one just so it’s not like that.